Sometimes, it is worth remembering exactly why I set up this blog: to reach out to guys like me. I often trail off, start talking about random things that don’t seem to matter, but that’s just the way I am; I have to write certain things to get them out of my head so I can stop thinking about them and it’s a sort of therapy working through it via typing it down.
Anyway, I am a type of guy who, even though I seem to exude confidence, sometimes, and a lot more recently, I lack it. I aren’t happy with a number of things in my life, and whilst I ignore them a lot of the time, it often doesn’t take long for me to become aware of them as soon as I’ve left the house.
But nevertheless, I try not to let my new found “body anxiety” hold me back. I still leave the house, I still dress how I want, and I just roll with it. Recently, it has begun to pay off though, as over the last few weeks, the random comments from passersby, which are positive comments or compliments, have been unexpected.
It all started at Pride, when I saw a colleague before going. I was wearing my white and black fade Dr Martens, sports socks with pink stripes, lavender dungarees covered in patches, a t-shirt that said “Puff Love” and I had purple glitter in my hair. It wasn’t until I want back to work after Pride that I had other colleagues asking to see pictures because this colleague had said how nice I looked.
Cut to the week after, I was casually doing some shopping in the supermarket, I was looking for a small loaf of bread (because I don’t eat a lot of it and didn’t want to be wasteful by letting a full loaf go mouldy), when a lady approached me and said: “I just have to say, I love your hair, the colour and style, it’s lovely” – bearing in mind, I have had gray hair since October last year and worn it in the same style for quite some time now, it was nice to hear.
And now, flashback to the weekend of Humber Street Sesh in Hull. I was fairly pedestrian that day because I didn’t want any nice clothes to get too dirty walking around a “festival”, but I still shoved on my gold hi-tops. Once my friend and I left, we went to grab some food, and as we left the fish shop, someone complimented me on my shoes.
Now, these things may seem minute, and not that important, but to someone like me, they are everything. When I am facing such a weird hole of despair regarding the way I look, it is truly precious when someone just picks up on something and compliments me. It’s that idea of “random acts of kindness”, and it really is something to consider. One word, or even one simple sentence, can change a persons day and you may just be saving someone from feelings of self-doubt.
Lesson for the day: do random acts of kindness.